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Month: April 2017

don’t blame it on the children

Whatever the reason you might hate a father or a mother, their children are without any of their sins.

They are innocent, they don’t know, they won’t possibly know or act accordingly.

But, for some strange reason, we tend to link the people that we hate with the people they relate to, even children.
It’s like vengeance maybe, our need for a greater source of justice.

But don’t confuse it with justice, because justice is a whole different thing.

There’s obviously a truth in this.
If the person you hate goes out with someone else, chances are that they talk to each other, and their friend will know their part of the story.
So they might hate you to, even if they don’t know you, even if you did no harm to them.

It’s a question of trust and in this way hate is transitive. It moves from person to person, from group to group, based on the trust they have for each other.
And there’s no reason to expect a different outcome because we all act this way.

When we listen to a sad story from a friend we don’t usually question it, unless it’s obviously cluttered and rambling.
Why would you even question it, they wouldn’t lie to you, and in fact they aren’t lying at all. It’s their part of the story and there’s no real truth.

Each people experience a small part of what the problem is.

Also,  hate goes on and on. It surpasses time and it gets passed like a virus and there’s no way to cure others from hate.

Hate is the only virus you can cure only in yourself. Because we are the source of hate.
We are bearers and so the only way to cure hate is to question our hate.
To doubt it by trying to understand what made them hurt us.

There is always a reason, maybe we don’t agree, but it’s rare to see people hurt others only because they like seeing the suffering.
Usually it’s because we all want different things, we all aim to a different view of happiness and joy, and that view might include hurting someone else.

Not because we want it, but because we need it.

Curing hate in you won’t cure others but it’s a start because from there on hate won’t propagate from you. It won’t have the right soil to grow and thus it won’t amplify again, at least on your side.

So yes, maybe nothing will change.

Or maybe you will start making a difference.

the old habits

Yesterday I got the chance to do again a “mastermind” with a dear friend and what I realized is that I was missing this kind of discussion.

What a mastermind gives you is not the ideas or the concept that you can forever improve.

It gives you another point of view, a way to confront with other people.

I wouldn’t be in any kind of mastermind, this is perfect for me because it’s made of people I trust, but what’s even more important is that it acts as a way to give me a small sprint forward, something I’d be too lazy to do each time.

if you can’t schedule it, you can’t do it

Have you ever talked to a friend and said “We should totally get a beer together another time sooner!” and then never made that call?

It might be that you don’t care, but in the other case maybe you’re too busy.
Life, work, life work, and you forget about these small little things.

So you are either faking it or forgetting it.
In the latter case there’s an easy cure: schedule it right away.

Bam. Done.

even the worst choices have a reason

crossing.png

See the red lines? It’s the part for bycicles (please ignore the cyclist that’s going into the street…).
The black one? For pedestrians.

The first time I walked into this street I wondered why on earth they would “switch” the two lines. It didn’t make sense, and looking at this from the photo it still doesn’t make any sense.

It’s horrible to see and to use. But as always, there’s a reason behind it and in this case the invisible reason is the bus stop.

The bus stop sign is on the left part of the image, near the wall.
The switch is required because otherwise pedestrian walking / waiting for the bus couldn’t get there without crossing with bycicles.

One could say they could put the bycicles on the other side, right? But this way they would risk having the bycicles too near the wall, which is unsafe, and maybe there are even more reasons behind this.

Even the shitties, crappiest result has often a reason behind it that makes it less stupid than it seems.
Even if it’s hard to admit, people think through problems and from time to time it’s not their fault.
They did the best they could do with what they had.

discover your weaknesses, remember your strengths

Today was a great day.
After years I finally had the change to confront myself with someone who is way more skilled than me in a tech topic I work on daily.

At first I was scared, and I am partly scared right now, not because of losing work, but because I feel like I need to step up my game.

But after this, I also realized two things

  1. I can learn!!! Something I always did by myself, finally I can get some insights from people who know more than me.
  2. I have strengths too. The problem is that in these cases we might tend to focus on the weaknesses, but we also have strengths: in my case adaptability and freethinking.

Every time you meet something better than you rejoice 🙂 it’s time to learn!

incentives and determination

In some companies economic incentives are the de facto standard to let people push output to the max.

They are the perfect shortcut to allow people to sprint to their max until they are exhausted.

Sadly though this is not the way to let people care about the product or service you’re selling.
To do so you’d first and foremost need a product everyone in the team uses, then and only then, you’d need people who are wise enough and mature enough to understand that their work depends on the product.

And the last thing is to recognize their effort.

As usual the shortcuts aren’t really the best solution. Just shortcuts.

making everyone happy

When you’re young you’re naive enough to believe there’s a way to make everyone happy.

The more you grow, the more inside you a thought gets built: that you’re the only one you can make happier.

Now, this is the other side of the fence, that’s true, but can we achieve a decent level of distributed happiness?
I think it’s possible only when all the teams involved are ok with losing something.

For example today we were discussing with a colleague what versioning system adopt.
I have a view, he has his, and the good part is that neither of us is wrong or right.
We simply have different approaches that are, probably, incompatible.

should one of us give up? Or maybe there’s a solution?
I am still naive enough to think a solution is possible, but maybe that solution is something I don’t like: having each his own different cake.

we need to consume less

In the easter moments like this I always think about consuming less.
We’re too far involved into a society that press us to consume more, build more, destroy more.

But this is not sustainable. An example? “Vegnanism”. Being vegan is probably unsustainable in the long term. Replacing meat with legumes might not be enough for 7 billions people.
Do we have enough fields? Can we sustain a business like that?

While obviously we can try, I think we are missing the main valid point that people that are vegan propose to the world: We are mass producing and mass killing animals and the food waste is too much.

Now in italy we all fear the palm oil, and ingredient we didn’t care for in 20 years now has become our main enemy.
But is that true? I think our main enemy is how much food we consume and waste each day. That is something we should really consider to change how the food industry is acting.

Less food, less animals will be killed, more chances of sustainability.
We can’t think of using up the resources of this world to 100%, we should consume less to allow room for growth.

Why don’t we do this? We’re used to this kind of “richness”. We’re used to see kitchen tables full of food, we’re used to big homes and to services that deliver us foods with lots of waste elements (plastic, etc).

The paradox?
It’s easier to become vegan because it doesn’t challenge ourselves but only the world.

another step forward

We fear it, making big choices. And we fear it because they are big, because we don’t think we can handle it.

We’re small, and to grow big what’s needed is some kind of hope.
A hope that there’s a light out there that can save us.

Today we started trying growing a little more with the small company I’m building. It’s strange because people are increasingly interested in the product although we’re not marketing it.