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Month: August 2017

you won’t ever be good enough

Being good at something is not a final goal. It’s a neverending story.

Each and everyday you will be better than the last, worse than the next. There is no shortcut, no way around.

But what if you listen to that voice in your head that says you can’t do it. That you don’t deserve this life?

I can’t do it, I quit. Those are the words.
Words so blissed, so relaxing. 
Quitting. It’s easy isn’t it?

Easier to quit than to question, easier to leave that to stay and fight against yourself.
In some cases quitting is good, but that is determined by who’s talking.
Is that little voice in your head telling you to quit?
If that’s the case, please don’t.

Please stay. Stay in that borderline where we all fight for our life. Where we try to make sense of this world, learning each and every day a new step, a new move.

Each and everyday being joyful because we improved and sad because we didn’t improve enough.

Because in life there won’t ever be a good enoug for the goodness you can be and do. But it’s a struggle without struggle that deserve each minute of your life.

Don’t quit. Don’t think you’re worthless. You’re not.

tell me about what you see and live, not what you drink

I remember when I went in japan for 23 days. 
Each of those days, at the end when I was at the hostel, I published on my facebook a photo and described it with the information I had.

Many people started following it, many loved it, some hated me.
That was my way to let my friends know what I was visiting, allowing them to breath some of the air I was breathing, to experience part of my trip.

What I often see instead is photos of people drinking, making selfies and so on.
The place has become a background to our photos instead of the main character. 

I feel bad for this, because we take the beauty away from us and from our friends. 
If each friend you have posted a more detailed description of the places they’re visiting you’d have the best guide in the world, you could decide what to see, what you like and what not.

In each trip of your friends you’d experience part of their trip, you’ll see through their eyes and listen to their stories. And once they’ll come back maybe you’d ask them oh tell me about that time when….

Sadly there is no story behind a drink.

you will always learn from life after living it

I often go back to a specific memory of my teenage years.

I was in love with this girl, I went to her parent’s holidays house in august. It was in Ostuni, Puglia, Italy.

I was 18-21/yo don’t remember the age. Yet I was inexperienced in any kind of relationship, love or not.
I loved her at that time, and I remember once we had to go to a birthday of a cousin.

I was ok with it, but didn’t know what to expect.
I dressed up the best I could and we went to this birthday. I didn’t knew a single person aside from my girlfriend of that time.

I didn’t know how to act with these people. I was a introverd, quite nerd, focused on japanese Anime and Manga and they seemed different.

To make it more difficult there’s the story of his cousin.
He lost his soon to be wife couple of years ago. She died while driving to get back to him to take him home.
He then started following a religious cult in italy, who knows if it was because of the death. 
Surely it must have been part of the reasons behind it.

That story made me struggle even more.
I don’t have precise memories of that day, although even retaining it is a big success for me, but looking back now I would act differently.

Maybe I’d be less fearful of the situation and enjoy it a little bit more.

Maybe I’d choose to stay by myself and live happily with the fact that we’re not all the same, who knows.

The thing is: you learn after living.
The first time you face a new situation you’re lost, you improvise and often improvise badly. But then you learn, you start understanding the rules of the game, what matters, what doesn’t.
You start understanding that afterall people don’t care about you, and even if they do, they often close an eye for it.

It’s not important to have a specific behaviour unless you’re an idiot.
What’s important is to live, be there, go with the flow be authentic and not being drowned by the fears.

That is enough to make a good impression. You might not shine, but you won’t suck either.
And I couldn’t learn this without going through it because I would then try to fake my authenticy, I would try to conform into the rules, to merge myself into the background.

We are part of the painting, and whatever we do, as long as it’s sound, will be part of the painting in a coherent way.

power and status

We often think that power is a result of the status you have.

So if you’re the boss, then you always have power over people.

While this may sound true there’s a glitch. Power is defined by the amount of control you have over other people’s lives. It’s not defined by your status.

In fact your status might not be related at all with it.

when you cry

Today I cried, and last time was long ago. I cried and didn’t held the tears.

It was good, it was bittersweet and it was a relief.

I realized that sometimes when I write I write to impress people. Because I know my writing has an effect.
But this time I wrote to convey a feeling, to send my message across the paper.

It was different, and at first I didn’t know what to do because I felt the writing was something else. I was worried that by straying out of the main road something worse might come out, but it didn’t.

It was worth it.

the tastes from the old days

Today I ate some pine beans (dunno if that’s the correct name, in italy we call them “Pinoli”, it’s the fruit of the pine, the seed thanks to which new pines grow).

They are delicious to me, and they remind me of that time when me and my granpa went to the school garden searching for the pines fruit.

It was great.

But while I was eating it I noticed that it’s quite a complex flavour, something one might not be accustomed to.
And if you think about it that’s the main problem when you eat something that’s not belonging to your home world.

The first time I drank miso-soup I hate it. It was disgusting.

Now I love miso soup and the reason why is that I started understanding the flavour and getting accustomed to all the nuances that are in it.
The point is: the world is full of flavours and tastes. Each unique, each special. What we think might be “bad” is something we’re not accustomed to.

Get accustomed, accept its flavour as part of your personal scale of flavours, and you’ll start loving it.

it’s in how you react

There are so many ways to react to a super-bad news you can’t count them.

But it’s what you do with your life after it that makes the difference.

Will it build up a good part of your character? Will it step up your game or will you feel defeated?

Your life might entirely change based on one event, but what will make the difference is you.

the strongest of all

The strongest of all isn’t the biggest, nor is the one that makes more noise.

His/Her power resides in the way he thinks and acts.

The strongest of all is happy for others if they are happy, and looks at them with respect when they succeed in the small things.

He doesn’t compare, because he knows that we all come from a different story. 
The strongest of all won’t win a punch battle, but will surely know what hurts the most, because he’s been hurt.

The strongest of all won’t deny his dreams, and at the same time will recognize his limits, knowing the boundaries between dreaming and lazyness, between hoping and cowardry.

The strongest is not the wisest, yet he knows things. He has experience and has empathy to share and teach. He’s not the best, yet he’s better than you.

He’s not something you can become in one life, but you can try.

The strongest is the part you are not freeing, the part that’s hiding, the part you fear.
Not because of its power, but because of the price you’d have to pay.

Because everything has a price, even being the strongest, and we might not be ready to pay its toll yet.