the words we don’t say

It’s in our story that we build up what we want to be. It’s in how we share frustration, pain, discomfort that we can elevate our goals and make visible the unknown: our thoughts.

A coworker told me today that ” I know you developers think meetings are useless but we need to do this bla bla bla ”

He put a definite accent on “you developers” and “you think”

While in my writing it can’t be show, his words and his story tell me two things: he has problem with the fact that meetings are considered useless. And he has a grief with some people of the group.

These things shows. They do show because even the best of us will have some form of body language if not, like this, almost direct wording.

And even though the words said are quite innocent, they’re not. The words we don’t say, the one we think of, they do show up in the other peoples while we talk to them, so it’s better for us to be honest and find a way to discuss these difficult topics before they become a kind of bad repetition in our head, a new story, a fake story, a story that will only lead to conflict unless on the other side you have someone that cares more about the topic than about the conflict itself

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