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I recently wrote about how much influence “things we don’t need” have over us.

Saying “No, thanks” internally helps.

We are constantly tested, even by normal things. Like skipping a habit we care about.

What might happen if we skip one day, right?

Willpower, intention, dedication, is a muscle. Every single time we choose to accept a detour, that muscle shrinks.

Be aware of this, learn how to have alternatives to do to not let it shrink, like a reduced/simplified version of the habit, or learn to cope with the small consequences.

It’s not always feasible, but it’s often worth it.

Life is often about marketing / selling.
Because marketing means marketing your ideas, to sell them to the people around you.

Want to go to a restaurant and you’e trying to convince friends? You’re doing marketing.

Choosing a new apartment? Marketing.

Selling has many forms, it’s not restricted to selling a physical object, but it spans across every interaction we have with humans.

What makes a difference is, as usual, how you sell it.
How you say it, what are the intentions you choose to surface in the negotiation, etc.

How are you treating your audience? Are you giving them a clickbaity punch line to lure them into your ground, or are you giving them some more respect?

Are you giving them the space to think about your proposal so that they can, too, sell back a different idea?
Selling is everywhere, but how we approach it is 100% personal.

Lately, I needed to change the way I eat because of some persistent stomach burn.

I intended to do this anyway, controlling my eating habits better is healthy, and it’s also a nice way to train my self-control.

So, it all started. I started eating more slowly, trying to be the last finishing the meal and to be present while eating, enjoying the different facets of flavors in the food.

I’ve started having less food on my plate and not taking food again after I finished.
Not only that, but I stopped drinking alcohol and pretending desserts at the end of the meal.

And then it hit me: How many things I did that were unnecessary?
Before this, if someone asked me: Do you want a dessert? I would’ve said Yes.
Now, I’d probably say No.

Of course, I would love to have it, but do we need it? Is it a requirement? Of course not.
All of this is part of the story we tell in our mind, on one hand, we might think “Oh, this is such a nice dinner, it’s been a while since I went out to dine, so I’ll take a dessert too”.

But as you can see, it’s not required per se. It’s just a story we tell ourselves. Yes, we could think of it as self-care, but I’d say the benefit to learning to say no more frequently outweigh saying yes.

Saying “No, thanks”, to our mind, or people asking, helps us control what we actually want.
To me, saying no allows me to understand that frustration, FOMO, sadness, that comes when I miss something. It happens even for a dessert, as if it was something important.
Except it wasn’t. A missing dessert is not a missing opportunity, not in life, not in a dinner. 
Afterall, it’s just a dessert.

Yesterday, the Air Conditioning folks came to address a problem with may AC system. They spent a couple of hours trying to figure it out, but eventually told me that they’ll need to come back Saturday or Monday, two or four days after.

They proceeded to leave, but what I didn’t realize is that they left the AC engine on, asking me (because I didn’t realize it was on) to not turn the electricity off.

Only at night I realized the AC was placed on the floor which made a lot of noise to us when sleeping. 

Things like these, things we can’t change, are the ones that test you the most. Because we’re left with wanting a solution, but with nothing we can actually do.
It’s when our calm is forged, it’s when we need to figure out a way to be, again, in control of us, while -not- being in control of what’s happening.

When traveling, sometimes it’s good to enjoy the serendipity. To enter a restaurant without looking at the reviews, to walk away from the beaten path.

Enjoy it. Even if it doesn’t have 5 stars reviews, if you like it, who cares?

As if the reviews would make our lives better, they don’t. The memory we create are the ones where we are together. It’s not the place, it’s the people.

Yes, a nice restaurant is great, but even a bad restaurant can give you a great story to tell.

Enjoy both.