I’m reading the “Choose yourself” book from James Altucher right now, and although many of the things are very “self help” like, there are some things that James surely add to the mix,
First, he’s not giving the same old advice, some of it is pretty original and, if not controversial, at least out of the normal thinking.
Reading this book is making me realize that when we think about improving we always think about skills.
Skills to earn money, skills to earn relationships, skills to earn respect.
This is the usual thinking when we think about changing ourself.
The goal is not to improve ourselves, but to solve a situation.
If we have not very much money then we’ll think about earning more money, if we are lacking good relationships then we’ll think about how to connect, if we want power then we will find a way to earn respect.
Thinking about this it seems that in many cases when we want to change ourselves all we really care about is changing our relation with the outside world, it doesn’t really talk about changing ourself.
It’s about fixing problems.
How could it be different? We are humans, we follow our desires, instead of building them.
The difference here is even more subtle.
And induced desire is something we acquire.
Much like the inception movie, an induced desire is implanted in our thinking.
We want power because we feel controlled by our boss.
We want money because we didn’t have enough to spend.
Who does implant it?
TV, Friends, family, social things, everything.
If everyone is marrying this year you might think that you want to marry someone too.
Here it is, implanted again, our mind reacts to both the tribe movements of our society and our social relationships.
Then it starts building and idea, an idea based upon those inputs, to create a definition of our perfect world.
But in this definition, something might be missing, and that’s one of the things I found refreshing in the James Altucher book.
We should nurture our inner self as much as our outer one.
And by outer, in this case, I mean the self-image we have, not our body.
Our body is another key part we should take care of.
Spirituality is not only about religion or faith.
Is about cultivating love with the world.
When I talk about spirituality I also talk about how you should nurture your relationships, not from a material point of view (sex, gains, etc), but from a connective point of view.
How many hearts have you touched this months?
How many people have you tried to touch within?
To how many did you show your true pain, your fears?
I’m not talking about complaining of what’s wrong with your life with your best friend, no, I’m talking about showing yourself as the fragile being you are, allowing people to touch your heart too.
But how does spirituality links with desire?
I talked about the inducted desire, the one which is not ours.
The question is: do we have a real desire? I think so.
I think we have a deeper desire which doesn’t relates with our personal goals.
It’s a desire to create a better world, to help people, to be happy and see happiness.
A desire to love our body, care for it as much as we do with our iPhone and maybe more.
A desire to hug your love or your friend without awkwardness, with no ego or sexual meaning.
Just for love.
I am very distant from the goal, I have yet to learn how to hug so deeply to make someone cry, but I’m on my way.
These goals aren’t visible in our daily life, and require lot of courage to handle because you will start questioning what’s really important and the answer won’t be money, won’t be power, the answer might just be unexpected.