the benefit of doubt

there will come a time where what you’ll say or do will be challenged.

Challenged by different opinions, by the harsh truth of reality, by an unfriendly person, or even by yourself.

When that time will come you might feel a new need growing into yourself, the need to allow some uncertainty in life, partly because you might just be right, partly because things aren’t always black and white.

That feeling is a concession only other people can give to you.

what if you sacrifice the unnecessary?

Sometimes I wonder what is really needed to sacrifice.
Many people say we have to suffer a bit to gain more, to earn more, etc.

I guess there’s some truth over there, but I also wonder if there’s something else that can be done to reach what we desire.

The first fact is that we can’t have it all.
We can, probably, but in an honest full and rich life, it’s enough if we only reach many of our goals, instead of all of them.

If you think about it, fulfilling some of your goals and dreams is enough satisfying that you don’t feel the need to reach them all together.
Yes, one after another you might want to do them all, but aiming at all of them together? Not a great case.

Instead, what if we could prioritize the goals and focus on what we feel important and what will give us energy and space?
If you think about it every time you don’t have energy or space (I mean freedom of thought, unleashing your creativity or just be calm in your shoes), then you usually can’t accomplish much.

But, on the other hand, what if you are happy and you actually have the time and energy to focus on the next thing?
Yes, right now you probably aren’t, but if you go through the list of your goals, your dreams, and search for the one that will give you energy and time, what would that be?

You might even add a new goal for that matter only.
To have time and energy.
Wouldn’t that be awesome?

Prioritizing that goal might be a great choice, and that’s what I’m trying to do these days.
I realize that I changed my goals many times, and many times I failed at reaching them.

The failure, though, wasn’t really a problem for me.
We fail all the time, why should we care? I learn from my mistakes and go on, and I adapt, I try to adapt and move towards what suits me best in the moment, and now I’ve finally realized that what I really want is time and energy.

To build that, I will need to free time, meaning I will sacrifice money for this goal.

Is money important? Yes.
But can we live with less money? Yes again.
What’s more important? Being full and without energy but with money, or having less (beware: less is different than none) and having time to dedicate to what you care about?

It’s personal, but to me the choice is clear.
Sometimes we have to sacrifice the unnecessary.

you get more when you give away

There is no rule here, but I can’t stop thinking that the value you put into the world by giving away things will give you way more than if you just kept it for you.

I’ve seen it from time to time, and I continue to think this way: Helping people, enriching them, enlightening them, builds a better world.
There’s more: it helps you.

Deep inside it helps you grow as a human by not being attached to success (it’s ok if you want success, not ok if your life depends on it.).
It helps you leaving a trace, helping people.

And it helps you in ways you can’t predict nor imaging, that’s the most beautiful thing of all.

So, today, help someone, give something for free, surprise someone.
One day, later on, the world will give its gift, but don’t expect them.

the things you can’t control

There are many things we can’t control.

Life is full of unexpected events, things that will strike in our lives without any notice.
We can’t do a thing against them, we can’t anticipate them, we can just live them

But what we can do is controlling how we handle them.
That is something in our powers.
Changing how we react, change our actions toward a more mature self, toward a constructive feedback, toward creations and not fear.

That is the goal.
The goal is not to be a superhero, the goal is to be a capable human being.

the space between any choice you make

There’s a space between taking a chance and staying still.

That space is long, is dark, and you won’t know what will happen.
That space is all an image of our minds.
A true image, but still the result of some thinking.

It’s the result of all the information we have accumulated about “how things should work”.
That you might fail (and it’s true), that you might just waste time (and it’s true).

But that space is also what differentiates you from the rest of the world.
Not because you took that chance or you stayed still.

No, that space differentiates you because it’s unique.
You, and only you, have that kind of space.
That dimension of fear, worries, and so on, exists in a measure defined by your mind, and no other space will be alike.

Therefore, it’s yours, because it has been constructed like a suit, just for you.

And it’s because of this that it seems so scary.
When we look at someone else’s struggles, we often find them laughable.
Because their fears are not ours.

What it is scary for us, it’s just boring for others.

And what if… it’s just boring for everyone?

amaze someone today

If there’s one thing that never cease me to surprise is when someone gets amazed.

When their faces light up for an unexpected gift, or when they can’t find the right words to express the deep gratitude they feel.

That sensation is something humans are born with, but we often forget that feeling.
There’s work to be done every day, and that is important.
But that glance… isn’t that glance in the eyes worth too?

Many times in this blog I talked about doing things, rarely I talk about asking, that’s because we should be the first ones trying to change the rules.
Even this time, I realize there’s only one advice I could possibly give.

Amaze someone today.
Allow the world to amaze you later on.

living with guilt

I feel guilty sometimes.
This usually happens when shit happens, like arguing, like a bad discussion.

I would have never wanted to live a situation like a harsh argue, but who would?
Every time it happens I wonder if I could have been better, and every single time the answer is yes, I could’ve done better.

I believe this is true for everyone, we are the variable in the equation of our life, we are the ones who can make a difference in the course of events, that’s why we can always do better.

But we don’t, and I didn’t.
I just went with the flow, as it has happened many times before, and after that all I got was some guilt.
I felt guilty, I feel guilty.
I feel guilty because I didn’t respect my potential, I let the events decide for me.
Deep inside I knew it wasn’t a good decision, but the outcome was very clear, I chose that over a more human resolution, a resolution that wouldn’t involve pride.

But all in all, I really feel guilty because I lowered down my potential, my energy and what I am and want to be.
I missed an opportunity to become a better human in this world, and that opportunity won’t come again.
There will be others, but that single lonely chance is vanished forever.

I also believe it’s alright to think about guilt and its implications. What other way do we have to improve if we don’t review our actions?

We need to measure ourselves with our best part, and then do the next move.

there’s a reason why fear will always stop you

On June 2nd, the EU Cookie law will become effective.
This is a law that requires every site owner to put a warning, sometimes a disruptive one, to inform users of cookie usage.

In case the usage of cookies tracks the user personal data then it is imperative for the notice to be as much disruptive and different from the website style as possible.

This is making many people freak out.
It’s understandable because the Law language is not understandable.

We don’t talk the way legal documents talk, because it’s inhuman.
Therefore when we have to interact with a law that has such a wide audience we are scared.

Scared because we don’t understand, scared because we fear the consequences.
Some people even shut down their websites in order to feel safe.

Only because of one single law.

This is the power of fear, the power of the unknown, but more than the unknown is that Law, and legal documents are something beyond the “normal human”, and they also add one spice to our dish, the “responsible” spice.

Who will be responsible for this?
That’s the freezing question.
No one wants to be responsible for doing nothing.
I just installed analytics to see how many visitors I have, how could I have been responsible of tracking users?

There’s a fine line here, the website owner just wants some stats, a number.
222 visits today.

That’s what matters to him (I’m talking about the simplest case).
But the analytics is much more than that and now he has become responsible without him truly understanding the consequences.

I don’t think this is a bad law, but I do think things might have been done better.
This law doesn’t move towards improving the web experience, which is why I consider it imperfect.
The web can’t be just controlled by this, we need something adaptable, flexible, otherwise many people fears will control the future of the web, making it useless, inaccessible, worse.

we should plan for life

Today I thought that we too often forget to plan for the life we want and desire.

Many things we need aren’t actually very needed, and in fact we can trade much of them for things that are way better in our life.

Planning requires making choices, defining what you want and work towards making it a reality.
Will you be willing to make that change?

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